Got caught with weed

So I’m a PIMO teenager who was born in the Borg and have been living a double life for about as long as I remember (even as a kid I knew banning holidays and not being able to have friends at school was bs)

I still did it, but I would go to meetings and basically go through the motions

Fast forward to today

I’m 16 and have broken just about every rule this religion has

However I’ve still “progressed” in the congregation getting baptized and last Friday I had my first 5 minute talk

My dad is an elder and my brother is an MS which should give some context as to why I’ve been PIMO and haven’t just left (also cause I’m underage)

but I’ve been smoking THC carts/disposable for about 8 months now

If I’m being honest I don’t regret anything

I’ve hotboxed the shit out of the Kingdom Hall restroom, passed microphones absolutely blasted and done just about every “theocratic” activity absolutely blazed

However yesterday it all came down crumbling This post is already long asl so to cut to the chase

my dad walked in my room and I had the pen in my hand and he asked for it The second he asked for it, I was already screwed so I gave it to him

And it doesn’t take more than a few seconds to figure out what something is

At first he thought it was a vape but after smelling it he figured it out

I did lie and say a kid from school asked me to hold it for him cause he was getting checked over the weekend, and while this excuse may work on regular parents

I have JW parents so my dad really said “I thought you were a good kid that didn’t talk to nobody and sits alone”

So my dad just admitted he thought I was a looser, but he kept going and it all came down to “do you know how much you disappointed Jehovah”

Keep in mind as far as they know, I didn’t even consume the weed, but the fact that I knew someone who did consume, and I chose to help them is enough

And JWs love talking about “bad companies”

One thing I am grateful for is that my dad told me “do you know how many families would have taken this to an elder”

My reaction was “aren’t you an elder”

And he said “I’m your dad right now”

So I’m definitely thankful this isn’t gonna end up in the back room of the hall, but I think I’ve lost most of my liberties now

For example my dads always been pretty light on how I dress to school

You would in no way think I’m a JW from the way I dress to school (what I want), but I think this is definitely gonna make my parents just a bit worse

Thankfully every day is 1 day sooner to my escape

Thanks to anyone who read this whole thing, just a little rant about my situation rn.