"I feel like 'women who are non-white or half-white and hate white men yet exclusively date white men' is like at least 5% of the population in Cali." Racial drama breaks out in r/bayarea as a tweet causes a firestorm!
CONTEXT A subreddit to discuss life and other subjects for residents in the San Francisco Bay Area, r/bayarea has a philosophical discussion about race and attraction. And by philosophical, I mean they sling mud at Asian women, White men, and everyone in between when they argue over a tweet poking fun at the (oftentimes true) circumstances of WM/AF heterosexual relationships. Prepare for some mildly spicy drama like your favorite pad thai!
Hajimari!
Lmao this is so specific and true.
Why is it yellow fever and not white fever? These Asian women are dating white men.
Because there is a very open cultural tendency to fetishize Asian women particularly, but asians generally dependent on context, and she is mocking that particular thing. There isn't a similar level of fetishisation of white men or white people in this country or in those subcultures(though of course fetishists of every stripes do exist).
White worship is pretty common among women of color. But that sort of a trend is mostly only acknowledged in ethnic communities. The white men getting these women often don’t really understand that they’re put on a pedestal (and are privileged in the dating pool), while the women often know that they are fetishized because it’s a mainstream phenomenon.
I'm not sure what is contrary to my point here, because I totally agree with you.
“There isn’t a similar level of fetishization of white men or white people in this country…” I was disagreeing with that part. There most definitely is, it’s just not recognized in the mainstream predominantly “white” culture.
"Most definitely" is a pretty high level of confidence you have there. But gotcha! I would say the mainstream nature of it makes it more necessarily prevalent, myself, but it's a pretty minor disagreement at the end of the day. "Similar level" involves similarity
How does one describe a fetish for white men?
How do we call that? Bleach fever? Vanilla fever? Ninja edit: oatmeal fever?
Colonialism
Shout-out to Frantz Fanon, who wrote a whole chapter on the dynamic between colonized women and the white man. The colonized women are taught to see the colonized man as a representation of the "old world" and to view the white man as the symbol of modernity, sophistication, and progress... aka a white male savior. It's a diabolical dynamic 🤮.
No. Because the Asian chicks you’re talking about have thoroughly absorbed Frantz Fanon’s ideology (which by the way is read by mostly white academics) but still behave exactly as you say. They’ll literally say “I hate white colonizer men” but go out and marry them. Fanon was incapable of understanding how someone in the future might read his work for social clout, but then completely ignore it in practice.
Lmao Asian-American women born in San Jose in 2002 drooling over white dudes “It’s because of colonialism!!!!” 😂😂😂😂😂😂
I’m specifically talking about upwardly mobile college educated Asian chicks in the bay from 2010ish on. Not 2002 low income viet chicks from East San Jose that like any white guy with a crappy 95 civic who says the n word a lot.
Zuckerberg’s wife isn’t a low income viet chick, she still chose a white dude Rich & poor Asian women love white guys regardless. Even in countries that were never colonized. Chinese women for example, can’t enough of all those European expats😂🤣
Chan is the archetype of what would become the rich upwardly mobile Asian woman who superficially voices her disdain for white men but very much adores them. What are you even talking about at this point? You’re having a different argument than the one I am. Me: “rich educated Asian women like to pretend they hate white men but also not so secretly love them” You: “yeah but all Asian women love white men” Like bro that’s not my point. My point is the hypocrisy of the educated rich ones.
A Latino resident weighs in on the yellow/oatmeal fever!
So freaky to me as a Latino dude on the outside
Truly. Freaky to me as a mixed race Latino guy. Asian girls will stare at me and just kind of look right past me because I’m not superficially white in ways that girls of other races never do.
That's funny. I'm a Latino guy who moved somewhere with a high Asian immigrant population and they seem to be really into me, lol. The immigrants, that is, not so much the American-born
Lmao Redditors talking about women not giving them attention: “it’s racism! It’s the white mans fault!” Sure, pal, that’s why
“I am just going to ignore a caveat in the comment I am responding to in order to insult a stranger who’s sexual appeal is completely unknown to me, based on the fact that they use an extremely popular and anonymous social media site”
Are Asian women just gold diggers? Is money important for all women?
I think she forgot "rich" part
Acting like money dosnt play a huge part factor in the whole process.
Except that Asians and especially Indians tend have higher average income in the US than their white counterparts. If it was such a large factor, you wouldn’t see these stats
Except rich Asian dudes get their pick as well. There are more white guys than Asian guys in the US.
An Asian guy with the same income as a white guy will be significantly disadvantaged in dating. See this study: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/1536504218812869#sec-1. "we found evidence that by ages 25-32, Asian American men continue to be excluded from romantic relationship markets. As revealed in our data (top left), these Asian American men are less likely than White, Black, and Hispanic men to be in a romantic and/or sexual relationship.”
I don't need a study to know that. Hollywood sells. Rich Asian dudes and Asian tech bros will do just fine.
Of course, the definition of "fetishization" is trotted out
She's just making a joke about a real issue of asian fetishism Edit: There's a lot of nuance to the definition. A preference to Asian people is fine. That preference becomes a fetish if you are dating and hypersexualizing an Asian person only because they're Asian. With no consideration to personality or anything else of them as a person.
Their point is that a lot of the women complaining about White guys 'fetishizing' Asian women, also fetishize White men themselves. And that is also a problem, but it doesn't get called out as much.
Yeah people in here really pretending like they don't know anyone who grew up with Asian family that put pressure on the girls to marry a white guy.
I'm Asian and I don't know a single other Asian person who had a family like this.
These people on Reddit aren’t fucking real
And the fetish debates continues!
what’s the issue with someone having a preference tho? how is that fetishism?
There isn't an issue with having a preference. But in summary, asian fetishism is a problem where one overly sexualizes asian people, more than one usually would compared to a normal preference. It becomes fetishism when you're dating them just because of their race, or if you prioritize race over everything else when dating someone.
so are the asian girls that only date white guys fetishizing white men then?
Yes. It goes both ways. There is a legitimate issue as well with Asian people dating white guys because of their perceived "higher masculinity" vs Asian guys. Or because of their higher wealth. Happens a lot e.g in the Philippines
fair play. so then since seeking out your preference to date is fetishizing, then what makes that an issue?
I haven't said seeking out your preference is fetishizing. That is a strawman. Read my comment again, please (this is not to get you mad btw). If you prioritize purely race when seeking to date, especially when it's oversexualized, that's a fetish. It becomes an issue because of the objectification of people. People dating others purely because of looks rather than for who they are as a person.
but you would agree that if someone were to have a preference, then it would be natural they would want to pursue that preference. according to you, focusing your time and attention to pursue your preference would then make you fetishizing. i’m not mad btw have dated all creeds and colors. i am going to stop replying here as you keep editing your responses after the fact.
If you insist on making sense and being rational, this conversation will go nowhere. Any suggestion that any suggestion of racial impropriety is off-base, is against the rules. Thank you for your compliance.
And it goes on and on and on! Seriously
You’re getting downvoted but it takes two to tango. 1. Asian women are often fetishized by white men. 2. A decent % of asian american women who won’t date Asian men (usually based on some degree of self hatred, brainwashing by western media into thinking Asian men aren’t attractive etc.)
- White men are often fetishized by asian women 2. It goes both ways > It’s a little more complicated than that, bc the fetishization of Asian women is due to specific Asian stereotypes of Asian women as passive and demure, but dragon lady/prostitutes in the sheets. Basically white men w Asian fetishes are dating for stereotype not the actual person. There’s often a racist component. There are no such specific stereotypes for white men, although there are elements of white supremacy and privilege that Asian women may be buying into or trying to obtain. But the only stereotyping is their negative stereotypes of Asian men. So in some cases I’d agree white men can be objectified but not fetishized the same way >> Few people seem to date interracially due to the actual person. Fetishism is common in these relationships. It’s a power dynamic. There’s an unmistakable element of narcissism and status seeking. This is why white men (and to a lesser extent white women) are the most sought out for interracial relationships >>> So liberal you became anti-interracial marriage. >>>> Not all interracial relationships are equal. Nor in the relationships themselves do they perceive themselves as equals. It’s an imbalance of power
The thread keeps going, so if that wasn't enough to satisfy you there is more! I hope you enjoyed all the... discourse on white men dating Asian women. All I gotta say is, I hope that all of my black, latino, and Asian brothers in the Bay get plenty of play this 2025, even if it isn't from the dragon lady Asian lady of their dreams. As for flair:
* "So liberal you became anti-interracial marriage"
* "Welcome to the bay, where we are so liberal we sound like the deep south lmao"
* "Asian men don't have it as bad as other races, Kpop softpower benefits Asian men"
* "There is no such thing as a 'software engineer'. Please stop"
* "Think of white worship and yellow fever as the yin and Yang of wmaf"
* "the problem is white women won't return my calls after I rave about japanese urbanism"
* "Women don't necessarily want to be rich, But they hate being poor"