does anyone else struggle to talk to other trans folks?

i have a couple trans acquaintances, but not really any friends, and that bums me out.

i have a really difficult time talking to trans folks, especially other transfemmes. i’ve generally done a really good job at overcoming social anxiety and developing some self-confidence, but talking to trans folks really makes me feel like i did in high school again.

i get really overwhelmed with gender envy, fear of not being accepted as “trans enough,” even just generally admiring/looking up to somebody who’s transitioned really gracefully and feeling nervous because of that.

it results in me honestly kind of avoiding entering into conversations with other trans people, which only exacerbates the feeling of isolation from the community.

also just really hate parties/bars, which is where i tend to encounter the most queer folks, but that’s neither here or there.

anyone else living with this too?