Arcane, and the problem of something already being done way better than I ever could.

I just finished the show Arcane. And while I've always been steadfast in wanting my fantasy more medieval sword and sorcery--something about that show has me thinking different. I just found the infusion of modern concepts such as guns and mechanical gloves, hammers and suits--along with the sword and sorcery so cool. And for a split second, I felt inspired. Then, I felt depressed. Because that show, indeed the wider League of Legends universe has already done anything I could think to do, and better at that.

A couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine asked me, "What do you want out of fantasy?" And I didn't have an answer. Why don't I know what I want? This whole subreddit is filled with wonderful creations from people that seem to know what they want to go for, or have at the very least found what they're going for. Me? I read Game of Thrones and I want that. I watch Arcane and I want that. I play the Witcher and I want that. I feel more like a sponge just sucking shit in--but I've nothing of my own, no ideas or twists on any of it. And I'm starting to doubt my own ability to create shit. And anything I'd come to think of has already been done, and way, way better.