I hate myself

Why is there so much self loathing. I’m a grown as fucking adult. My life is in my grasp, my hands, and yet I fall apart every time I try to get out of my head loop.

There is so much more to life, and yet I feel boggled down. Anyone else feel this way?

I don’t think a pity party is what I’m looking for. What I’m looking for is a reason to focus on my life in life.