Weight Gain and Exercise

So, I need to lose some weight and get healthier before this baby arrives. I just had a severe wake up call that completely ruined my Christmas. For some context, some photos were taken of me without my knowledge and I don’t look anything like I thought I did in my mind. I looked…. Gigantic and that is not an understatement. I looked literally 100 pounds more as to what I thought I did, and I look about 20 years older. My entire face was a circle, my laugh lines were so deep, and my eyes looked so small and squinty from all the fat on my face. I genuinely looked like a completely different person. I still cannot believe it. I showed a few people the photos and they all insist I don’t look like that. Even my mom, who is brutally honest. She laughed and said that didn’t look like me at all and it was the angles. It was two photos and the funny thing is that everyone else looked like how I see them…

I’m so devastated. For context, I currently weigh 242 and I’m 5’8. Back in January, I weighed 205. When I first got pregnant in July, I was 225. This is the most I’ve ever weighed in my entire life and it just keeps going up and up. I eat healthy, I just eat a lot. I never had morning sickness so I’m starving all the time. In the beginning, I slept a lot and now whenever I try to get some exercise, I get a pounding headache, which my doctor isn’t concerned about. I can’t win. I’ve done a good job lately at cutting out certain foods and eating less. Now I’m focusing on exercise. I ordered myself a walking pad so I can get my 10,000 steps every day. I don’t have the money or the means to do much else. My doctor said running isn’t good. Swimming is okay but I don’t feel up to wearing a bathing suit right now. Any advice is welcome, even brutally honest advice. I’m hoping that the walking will make even the slightest difference. I’m also wanting to use it postpartum to get me ready to go back to work as I do work at a labor intensive job. Lately, it has been slow so I’ve been getting little to no exercise. I also would like to hear any similar stories or anyone else who is going through the same thing. I’ve never seen myself like this and it’s making me feel so disgusted in myself. I’m so embarrassed to be seen now. I was so proud of being pregnant and showing off my belly, now I don’t want to go anywhere again.