I am denying my ex wife her last wish

So, I (45 M) had a previous relationship with Lucifer (Names made up for privacy. 43 F). We were married for 5 years and dated for 7. From this, we had 3 kids (Again, names made up for privacy) Dean (21 M), Kylie (19 F) and Jax (17 M).

Context: A few months before I filed for divorce, I noticed Lucifer becoming increasingly controlling and paranoid. Like, if I went out, she needed to know where I was going. Example, I went to my Nan’s flat to help her (along with my uncle) get some new, heavy furniture inside the flat. Despite the fact that I had told her earlier where I was going, she demanded to know where I was going.

I researched why these types of things might happen and found out it might be a sign of cheating. Turns out, I was right.

Basically, a friend of mine saw her and another man kissing and flirting inside a restaurant where he was with his siblings and mom. He sent me photos. I filed for divorce, blah blah blah. You get the idea. I didn’t really care what I got in the divorce, I only pushed for 80/20 custody and to keep my money. Surprisingly, she didn’t contest anything but the custody. I got 70/30 instead of 80/20 but hey. I picked myself up because I still had majority custody.

Anyway, this year. My ex got terminal cancer. When Dean told me, Kylie and Jax, I didn’t really care. I comforted my kids but ,personally, I didn’t care. In fact ,I’m ashamed of myself because of this, I was kinda excited to get full custody of Jax. (Dean has already moved out and Kylie decided she wanted to stay with only me when she turned 18).

So a few days after, I got a call from Dean. He told me that Lucifer was bed-ridden and she had asked Dean to talk to me. Basically, her last wish was to have one last conversation with me. I told Dean (quite bluntly, I’ll admit) that “No, I would not talk to her.” All care I had for this woman evaporated when I found out she cheated on me. Dean understood but told me to expect a call from his maternal side as they had basically treated her like the world revolved around her in her last few months.

Somehow, my ex in-laws got my number and have been bombarding me with texts and calls calling me heartless and evil for not granting my ex her final wish. My kids and my ex’s cousins (whom she never got along with) are on my side. But all of Lucifer’s family and a few mutual friends are on her side.

Thanks for Listening Reddit.