have you ever thought about having an elder brother?

Hey, have you ever thought about having an elder brother? I've always wished I had one. It would be great to have someone to share life experiences with, you know, like having a built-in confidant.

I imagine it would be amazing to have someone who's been through similar situations, someone who could offer advice and guidance. We could sit and talk about our lives, share our joys and sorrows. Just thinking about it makes me feel like I'm missing out on something special.

I know it might sound weird, but having two elder sisters just isn't the same. Don't get me wrong, I love them to death, but it's different with a brother. They're always looking out for me like a mother figure, you know? They're always telling me what to do, what not to do...it's like they're trying to protect me from everything.

But the thing is, I don't really connect with them on a personal level. We rarely chat, and to be honest, I don't really like sharing things with them. I've tried before, but it always ends up getting back to my mom. Both of my sisters tell her everything, and I really don't like that. It feels like I don't have anyone to trust.

So, I've just stopped sharing things with them altogether. It's not that I don't want to, it's just that I don't feel like I can. And that's why I wish I had an elder brother. Someone who could keep my secrets, offer me advice, and just be there for me without judging me or running to my mom.

I don't really have a strong connection with my mom's or dad's side of the family either. Since childhood, I've felt like an outsider. We don't really have family traditions or anything like that. It's just a bunch of people who are related to me, but we don't really connect.

I find it hard to get comfortable with people my age too. I actually feel more at ease with those a bit older. I think it's because they've experienced more, you know? They've been through the struggles and come out the other side.

And, to be honest, I've always felt like an invisible student in school. I used to sit in the 3rd row, 1st bench alone in 10th grade. Yeah, I was like a ghost. Since 6th grade, I've been that kid in the classroom who nobody talks to. It's like I'm invisible. So, I've just gotten used to being alone, I guess.

Anyway, I really wish I had someone older to look up to. Someone who could give me advice, share their experiences, and just be there for me. I guess that's just something I'll always wish for.