Today is finally the start of the World Championships. This year I made BINGO-cards for me and my friends to play along with SVT:s coverage. What would be on the BINGO-card for your local TV-channel?
Explanation for some boxes:
Explains bad joke: I admit, I should have written silly instead of bad.
Monologue about ancient times: likely to come in the individual event. Other components in the monologue is that the biathletes removed the skis while shooting and didn’t learn the results until the day after.
Promotes Stadionkampen: SVT is a government owned channel and can thus not contain commercial. However, the aggressive way Ola promotes Stadionkampen (which is broadcasted by SVT) is a borderline case. Ola was previously criticised by superiors after he said that Fischer skis was worse than Salomon skis during the icy Annecy pursuit.
Mispronounce Häcki-Groß: they say Gross like cross. Normally I wouldn’t have this in a BINGO-card, but Ola was very know-it-all how to pronounce Anaïs.
Assumed role as Swedish cheerleader: perhaps Olas most prominent attribute. Yes, he has cheered when opponents missed shots. This scene played after Sweden won a mixed relay bronze last year:
Ola Bränholm: Sweden wins their 80th championship medal! Now the gathering towards the eleven from Oberhof commences. Björn Ferry:So exciting. But it feels like it could’ve went even better. It was a bit unstable actually… but we got a bronze and that is nice. OB: But… do you agree with me that if the race was twenty meters longer Elvira would have lost against Baserga? BF: Yeah cause she really was cooked. She started to look behind herself and… yeah. Maybe a little worrying cause it looked like Germany and Switzerland had really good surf. OB: [noticeably annoyed, bordering angry] But can’t you be happy right now!? Sweden has won a world championship medal! BF: Yes… yes I can but it’s like… OB: …start to talk about worrying things. That’s mean. BF: [laughs] Alright then. Yipee!
No, no, no! is said every time something bad happens. Last time it happened was in the Antholz relay situation.
”Hit the last target now”: or in Swedish sätt sista skottet nu is said every time in a tense situation. Surprisingly often Ola ends up jinxing it.
Ola names many teams as potential winners: This one can already be crossed over. He posted on his instagram story that France, Norway, Sweden and Germany were favourites and Switzerland and Italy as challengers. Mathematically he thinks that 25% of the field can win.
Johan K psyches out an athlete: originally this was my favourite “Lotta is on first-name basis with Vetle” but apparently SVT didn’t send Lotta. Johan K can be very confrontational in his interviews and sometimes that can make athletes sad.
”…but it is also a hit”: or in Swedish ”det är ju träff det också” is the shooting coaches standard comment to a near miss. Yes, my 3:00 a.m. brain translated that one bad as well.
Olas obsession with parents: sometimes it feels like Ola is talking about his favourite soap opera. He loves telling who is related to who. We will probably hear it already today in connection with the construction of the biathlon facility. My personal yearly anecdote was “Mari Eder was formerly known as Laukannen until she married an Austrian named Eder. But not Simon Eder.” It was sure to come up every time she came in focus on the shooting range.
Perrot speaks Scandinavian: his mother (?) is from Norway and thus he speaks Norwegian in the interviews with Swedish tv. After the interview Ola always makes a comment about him speaking Scandinavian that he wouldn’t say about Bø, Lægreid or any other of the Norwegians.