Couples therapist wouldn’t see us because I told her he had laid hands on me

My partner and I have been going through a really hard time and the relationship has become toxic. There are a lot of trust issues and triggers that we cannot speak about without it turning into a huge argument. Recently, when that has happened, there have been three occurrences of my partner becoming violent/aggressive towards me.

None of these occasions have been severe violence or ended up with injuries but there has been slapping, shoving to the point I fall, throwing objects at me or breaking things.

We went to our first couples counseling today and I told her about this. She said she can’t ethically see us and that he has to go through three months of anger management in order for us to see her…

I feel lost and like I need help. I live with my partner and now that we don’t have anyone to help mediate, which we drastically need- I feel like it’s going to get worse. We can’t communicate without it escalating and I don’t want it to get even worse.

Looking for advice ..