UofT Computer Science isn't a program, it's a cult
Alright, so I just finished my first semester in UofT CS, and I’m pretty sure this isn’t a real program—it’s a cult disguised as a degree. Hear me out.
- The assignments are rituals. They don’t even teach us in lectures. They just throw 17 pages of pseudocode at us and say, “Figure it out, or the gods of recursion will punish you.” I swear, I submitted a Python script last week and got a comment back that just said, “The algorithm pleases us.” WHO IS US???
- The TA meetings are sus. You don’t meet in normal rooms—they lead you to some dark basement in Bahen, and there’s always a TA with a hoodie and red eyes who says cryptic stuff like, “Big-O is watching.” Last time, I asked a question, and the TA whispered, “Only those who seek lambda shall find peace.” BRO WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN.
- The final exam is a summoning ritual. They put us all in Convocation Hall at midnight, hand out 10-question tests written entirely in binary, and chant “Hello, World!” until the lights flicker. People say if you fail, you get “reassigned” to Rotman Commerce.
I’m scared, man. My friends in Artsci are living normal lives, but I haven’t slept in weeks, and my dreams are just pointers chasing me in C. Can someone confirm if UofT CS is real, or should I transfer to TMU and vibe???