How I would have written Stefan and Caroline's relationship

I began watching TVD for the first time a couple of months ago and have just completed season 6. Let me preface this by saying I have always loved the idea of Steroline getting together. They were my favourite characters in the show, they had a beautiful bond with some heartwarming (albeit sparse) moments prior to season 6, and I have always had a soft spot for 'friends to lovers' storylines.

Now season 6 did make them canon, and I WISH I could be happy about it. But it's so hard when the writing of their relationship was nothing but horrific. An abomination, really. There aren't any fanfics I can read to ease my disappointment, I'm not nearly talented enough to write a fanfic of my own about the two, and the character limit on twitter is far too little to alleviate my anger, so here I am on reddit to rant about all the crimes the writers committed against Steroline and what I personally would've changed

Crime 1 - It should've been Caroline that helped Stefan regain his memories when he had amnesia

What. a. missed. opportunity. It was literally Caroline who studied everything about amnesia when she found out Stefan lost his memories. Why wouldn't she be the one to help? It would've been such a meaningful parallel to when Stefan was helping Caroline adjust to being a vampire. When he'd get hungry and curious and tempted, Caroline would be there to stop him before he ever hurt anyone. THIS should've been the moment where their transition from friends to lovers began. Ideally, Caroline would've told him about Damon and Elena, and Stefan would've found himself not caring as much - because Caroline was there anyway.
Stefan saying he would be there for Caroline later on would then carry more emotional weight, and overall set a romantic undertone in all their following scenes together

Crime 2 - It should've been Caroline that helped Stefan realize the root of his PTSD and overcome it, not Katherine

Listen, I know those moments between Katherine and Stefan were hot and they're hot, and that there's a lot of Steferine fans. I get it. I admit their chemistry was palpable. But god forbid this man has a healthy relationship with literally anyone else. Getting together with a girl who has the same face as his ex is not moving on, it's just sad. My boy Stefan deserves better, okay. Anyway, it should've been Caroline to snap him out of it, again cementing the fact that Elena and Damon may not have been there for him but Caroline is and will be.

ALSO - if the above two scenarios were canonical, it would've made much more sense why Lexi would've suggested Stefan was staying in Mystic Falls for Caroline, right???

Crime 3 - Stefan's treatment toward Caroline in the beginning of s6 was (for the most part) completely out of character

I know Stefan was mourning his brother. I can agree Stefan running away and starting a new quiet life was in character, but how indifferent he was towards hurting Caroline was absolutely not. You can't convince me that Stefan Salvatore out of all people would refuse to apologize to Caroline until like 8 episodes into the season. Why did he have to be so cold? I'm accepting of the reason that he pushed her away because he didn't wanna remember Damon and cry to her anymore (I actually liked that kind of angst, sue me), but if that were the case he could have shown at least a little hesitation about leaving. He should have shown some regret walking away. Maybe if the writers had made him show some real remorse for what he did earlier on, it wouldn't have felt like he only stayed with Caroline for the rest of the season out of pity for her mom.

Crime 4 - Stefan being oblivious was dragged out and his big "realization" moment was so dumb it was almost offensive

Why did literally everyone have to spell it out for him? 160+ years old and can't make a decision by himself? Like he hadn't experienced relationships before? Also, why in the absolute hell would he only realize that he liked Caroline like that after her mom's funeral. Are we kidding?

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I can probably think of 237 more things to fix about their relationship but these are the main ones I can think of for now.

As of now I still like them, but I can't love them, and I hate that I can't just because of some dumb writing decisions (and maybe also acting decisions ?).

There are still aspects I do enjoy about their relationship (some of their season 6 moments were so beautiful and intimate), but it just sucks that their relationship didn't get the same amount of love and care from the writers as Damon/Elena or Caroline/Tyler (which, imo is still the best written romantic progression thus far).

TLDR; Steroline deserved so much better and this post is just me coping.