39.5 / Male / Germany - Amidst life's ecstasy and agony, I have a place. I need a woman to make it home. ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐จ
๐จAttention!๐จ My profile will be longer than the Halwa Puri line at Dilpasand on a Sunday morning. I want to give as many details as possible to help you decide if there is potential for your Selina Kyle ๐โโฌ to match my Bruce Wayne ๐ฆ. I have made it hilarious and presentable to go easy on your attention span. There is no intention to oversell or sound arrogant. If the line between humor and my technical specifications blurs a bit, you can ask for clarification in the comments or when you reach out.
If you just want the profile based on the template, read chapter 1 & 2 and skip the rest of the post. Those sections are based on the template, just use different wording.
๐ฅ So, with that ado out of the way and with a bit of further ado...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
https://reddit.com/link/1gvywq0/video/fkob0oohu32e1/player
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
โ ๏ธ Trigger Warning(for women) โ ๏ธ The following matrimonial profile may induce feelings of love, affection, longing for companionship, and awaken the hopeless romantic within you. Possible side effects may also include loss of appetite, sleeplessness, and a perpetual agony over your singlehood. A desire to contact the potential suitor may occupy you for days thereafter. Although I cannot solve or remedy the aforementioned pining, I strongly encourage you to give in to that inner tension and message me to declare your interest. ๐
WINSTON: In burying Charon, I was tormented about what to put on his grave. A handful of words trying to sum up an entire life.
JOHN: What did you decide?
WINSTON: "Friend", thatโs what he was. Above all things. A friend. Made me wonder what theyโll put on mine.
THE BOWERY KING: "Long Live the King", had mine carved years ago.
WINSTON: Ambitious.
THE BOWERY KING: Prophetic. Your stop. I will see you when you are a free man, one way or the other. Au revoir, Monsieur Wick.
JOHN: Thank you, Winston.
WINSTON: Jonathan. Sunrise is at 6:33. Try not to be late. For both our sakes.
JOHN: "Loving husband". Thatโs what I want on mine: "John - loving husband."
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: Today, on Pakistan Rishta, the fine gentleman that we have invited for a conversation is your old school, chivalrous, traditional man. He has a deep rooted sense of romance and packs some serious potential for epic husbandry. Please welcome, as he is famously known by his moniker around here, Quaid-e-Charisma...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
๐ Quaid: Before we start, I will answer your questions as if I am speaking to her.
\* crowd goes wild again for 3 minutes, 8 seconds *\**
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: For starters, can you tell us a bit about yourself?
๐ Quaid: Sure. I am a 39.5 years old male from Karachi, with a small family of three brothers and three sisters. I am the youngest in my family. Both of my parents have passed away.
I weigh around 80 kilograms(last I checked) and am 5 feet, 8 inches tall(slightly taller than Tom Cruise). I have an average build and wheatish complexion. A lot of people have told me I look younger for my age. That could probably be because of the rare Hawaiian Crow I have for breakfast which comes from a monastery in the Himalayas.
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: And we are right to assume no woman has been lucky with you so far?
๐ Quaid: Yes, I am single but I would like to think we would both be lucky to have each other when that happens.
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: Have you actually settled into a profession or are you still waiting for that letter from Hogwarts?
๐ Quaid: I have done Bachelors in Computer Science and am employed full time as a software developer in Germany ๐ฉ๐ช.
A software developer in his natural habitat.
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: Apart from your job, what else occupies you?
๐ Quaid: When I am not writing software, I like to:
๐ Read: I read books on religion, science, psychology, metaphysics, subconscious mind, philosophy, etc.
๐ Exercise: I have started my fitness journey multiple times and will do so again in the near future. I struggle with consistency a bit. I also like to go for nature walks, hikes, long walks etc.
๐ง Meditate: I meditate for about 45 minutes first thing in the morning.
๐ฟ Watch: I watch movies/series but don't really invest a lot of time in following everything, cricket especially South Africa's matches, documentaries and Islamic lectures.
๐ง Listen: I am an oldies guy and don't really follow any specific artist/genre(music), just whatever sounds good to my ears. I also listen to podcasts and Islamic lectures.
๐น๏ธ Gaming(seldom): I used to play a lot back in my college days but have become a little rusty now. I rarely get the time but plan to get back into it.
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: Don't disappoint us by saying you don't plan to make more copies of yourself.
๐ Quaid: Yeah, kids love me so definitely, they are on the menu. Although it will be some sort of a monumental undertaking to break my father's record of eight children, ๐๐ I am more inclined towards discussing it with you and reaching a decision mutually(all the while sacrificing my progenitive Mach3 for you in the process ๐). I wish to give all my energy and attention to their mother for the first year so hope to have them after our marriage anniversary inshaAllah.
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: Faith is a very important part of your life I have been told.
๐ Quaid: I don't like to advertise my religiosity but I understand it is important for potentials to know. Islam is at the centre of the kind of person that I want to become and I always look up to Quran and Sunnah for guidance and to improve as a human being. I struggle with regularity/consistency in prayers. I maintain high moral standards and a good character, to be someone who tries to do the right thing to the best of his knowledge and judgement. I am open to sharing all the details in this area with you in private.
I was born in a Sunni family but have outgrown the typical beliefs through self study and listening to different scholars Alhamdulilah. I have the mindset of studying/researching Quran & Sunnah and it would be nice if you have the same mindset as well.
I am open to Shias and reverts provided they have the correct fundamental beliefs and are open to learning and understanding religion instead of being stuck in rigid interpretations/beliefs passed on to them.
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: Is there something interesting about the man people should know?
๐ Quaid: Here are a few interesting things about me.
๐ด๓ ง๓ ข๓ ฅ๓ ฎ๓ ง๓ ฟ English Linguistic Skills: My English linguistic skills are better than my Urdu and Sindhi linguistic skills. The voice in my head also speaks to me in English most of the time. It is highly likely that all seductive, flirtatious, and romantic correspondence will be carried out in written and verbal English. ๐
๐ Slightly Ambidextrous: I can perform some actions ambidextrously like brushing teeth, beating an egg, using cutlery, etc. I write pretty okay with my non-dominant hand.
๐คก Sense of Humor: I have a great sense of humour(often told by people) but it works best when allowed to flow naturally. I tried improv but dropped it because it felt forced.
Since we are on it, here are three originals from yours truly:
- It hurts when you step on a lego because they find it really hard to lego.*
- Jill and John had a daughter, they named her "Becca". They had another one after two years. What did they name her?**
- What would we call it if we use cocoa powder to bury someone?***
๐ผ Minimalist: I am a minimalist and always look to declutter my life. I don't take pride in or love to own stuff.
๐จ Creative: I would like to think I am creative. ๐ค
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: Is your housing rented?
๐ Quaid: Yes, my residence in Germany is rented.
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: What type of household are you looking to settle in?
๐ Quaid: Since you will be relocating to Germany and moving in with me, it will be a nuclear family from day one. I look forward to our fission and fusion! ๐
๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ Host: How soon are you looking to get married?
๐ Quaid: Sooner than it takes to cook Maggi but within a year sounds good too.
I will try not to make it sound like an Amazon wishlist! ๐ฌ
Here goes the soorat mat wali si which is on mere khayalon chayee...
๐ฅณ Age: Between 21-30 years old.
๐ Education: Atleast a graduate but being sensible and intelligent is far more important to me than labels and degrees so not a hard requirement.
๐ฉโ๐ป Profession: Preferably, a software developer but not a hard requirement. A working woman is also not a hard requirement.
โ Non-Sindhi Background: I am consciously looking to break the same caste/community marriage culture in our society so won't be able to consider proposals from a Sindhi family.
๐บ๏ธ Location: Open to any location.
Now, let me explain a few more qualities that I am looking for in my future wife.
๐ Religious
I can't ask for someone who is more practicing than me so it is okay with me. However, you should be someone who strives to be more practicing and a better muslim. Islam should be important to you, something you look up to for guidance and as a way of life. It would be nice if you are a hijabi or dress modestly and plan to be a hijabi out of your own will after marriage(I am open to talk about it).
๐ซ Great Human Being/Communicator
Above everything else, I want someone who is a great human being. I could go on and list all the qualities like kindness, compassion, empathy, caring, understanding etc. The list is too long to put here but hopefully, you get the idea.
I love a cultured, educated woman whose sophistication shows in her speech and actions.
I don't play games and am a strong believer of talking things out so you should have the same mindset.
๐โโ๏ธ Mental Health / Physical Health
Someone who actively works towards staying mentally sharp and physically fit and in shape.
๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐จ Marital Sense
Someone who understands the basic marital problems and the marital problems that are a product of our era and technology.
๐คฃ Ticklish
I am extremely confident in my sense of humor to make you laugh but it would be nice to have a little insurance policy. This is ofcourse not a hard requirement but I will always try in case my usual charms fail.
Here are a few things due to which it might not work out between us:
๐ด Past relationships(where you got physical): Although I have been emotionally involved with a few people, I have always had strong physical boundaries so I would prefer that you have had them too.
๐คฌ Emotionally unintelligent/unstable: I like being around calm people. People who respond, not react. You should be someone who remains composed most of the time.
๐ Materialistic: If you are always chasing money and stuff, lacking gratitude and unhappy with what you have, and believe happiness is somewhere in the future or in the next big thing.
๐ Unethical/Immoral: I maintain high moral standards and I want you to be the same.
The profile is officially over. You can stop reading now.
Since this is marriage we are talking about, here are some more important things about me that might give you a glimpse into my personality. I am adding them as extras because I wanted to add them but keep the main profile less busy:
๐ง I have an altruistic personality.
๐ญ I don't smoke, don't drink, don't have any addictions, and only consume halal.
โ๏ธ I don't assign too much weightage to my achievements but I really value the human side of me. That is what I am really proud of. Someone's pain that I feel in the moment and try to do something about it. Life seems worthwhile because of those days. Preferably, my human side should impress you more than anything.
๐ต I have a provider mindset but at the same time, I want to be a supportive and an empowering husband. I will fully support you if you wish to study or work after marriage. However, the financial responsibility will lie completely with me. You will be free to decide what you wish to do with your financial freedom. All I would require from you is to be astute in financial matters and spend my earnings whatever I earn for us wisely.
๐คฟ I love to have deep, logical, rational, and intellectual conversations and have naughty/goofy energy 24/7. I can effortlessly switch between the two.
๐ฉฒ I have a strong sense of privacy and don't use social media. I don't like to put my personal life on the internet and only share impersonal content. A few platforms are an exception because of anonymity.
๐ฅ I have been living alone since the last 3/4 years so I am more than capable of doing house chores. I will be a handy sidekick to your super housewife and come prepared for tougher pregnancies!
๐ง Meditation has really changed my emotional dynamics. I am deeply in touch with how I feel and able to express it in a healthy manner. I have understood and really beginning to believe that life is about the important things, everything else is just noise. Although I do get angry, I prefer to stay quiet when my internal dynamics are disturbed. Only when I have regained my composure do I like to address the issue at hand.
โค๏ธ I am a hopeless romantic.
https://i.redd.it/88v2r62t142e1.gif
๐ช I strongly believe that love has to show in our words and actions. Treating each other fairly and respectfully cultivates love. In the absence of these, it is very hard for love to grow and flourish. Even if there is a lot of it to begin with(for whatever reason), it will die a slow and painful death in the absence of high morality and ethics between the spouses.
๐ People have told me I am a great conversationalist.
๐ง I am a sapiosexual.
๐ฐ I will be looking for a simple Nikah and Valima which is easy for both the parties on multiple fronts. I don't like the dowry system and more than ready to finance every single thing for you once you have signed that Nikahnama. I think starting slowly with whatever we can afford would allow us to grow closer and respect each other more.
๐ I love pizza! If it was the end of the world and there was one last thing I could do, it would probably be something far more important than eating pizza but I love pizza!
๐จ I love ice cream! But I find it hard to decide what I love more. Pizza or ice cream.
As you can clearly see, I haven't put a lot of effort into my profile but still, I hope you enjoyed reading it.
Here are the explanations/answers for the humor I failed so badly at earlier.
*Wordplay on "let go" by removing "t" to make it "lego". ๐งฑ
**They named her "Rebecca". ๐คฃ
***We would call it "cadburial" or "cadburying someone". ๐ซ
Since we live in strange times, here is a small disclaimer to cover that legal side of things.
Disclaimer: All qualities mentioned therein are non-fictional and declared with integrity and utmost honesty. Any resemblance to a character straight out of a romantic novel is unintentional and cannot be tried in any court of law on grounds of dating, courtship, wooing, or peacocking.