ashamed and scared (ZOCD)

i don’t know what to do. i have been experiencing ZOCD for like the past 2 weeks now, and i feel like i’m going insane. i have never once looked at an animal and regarded them in a romantic or sexual way. i think most of it stems from the fact that i used to watch videos of animals mating and m* to it when i was younger, because prn felt too intimidating. i was not sexually attracted to the animals themselves, but rather just the fact that it was a sexual act, i was young, and didn’t understand the weight of it. i carry so much shame from this. it makes me feel abnormal and disgusting. i live in constant fear and obsession over the possibility of developing an attraction to animals. i also grapple with the moral dilemma of zophilia itself, and that makes me feel like an apologizer or like i actually am one and am just lying to myself. i don’t know what to do or how to shake this worry.