Client told me she wants to sue plaintiff for “bullshit.”

Unfortunately I didn’t take bullshit law in law school.

After demanding I sue the plaintiff for bullshit because he’s a fraud, to which I told her I couldn’t help with that, she told me she didn’t want to speak to me again if she didn’t “legally” have to and promptly hung up.

It’s been a long day. I need something to uplift me. Tell me your wackiest client demands.