Horses with "big" personalities

Does anyone else have one with a big personality? I'll try to describe mine below

• he has absolutely no manners and is built like a fucking school bus

• he is a hippopotamus that needs to get his priorities straight

• he tricks people into thinking he is a sweet boy so they get close so he can bite their knees

• he is gluten free and has a bajillion allergies

• he likes chasing geese

• he dragged me into a ditch once because he is a fatass and wanted grass

I know this is all terrible horsemanship but we are working on it