I’m kinda tired now

While celebrating the new year with some family, I had been drinking when someone said “wow I can’t believe it’s already 2025”. I tend to be a bit emotional when I drink and I started to tear up after they said that. I thought “wow I’m going to be 25 this year yet I’ve still never experienced love”. Nobody has ever loved me. I try very hard to act like it doesn’t bother me. I try to distract myself a lot, and it works most of the time except at night when I’m alone with my thoughts.