Little reminder about "red flags"

Some people seem to think that a red flag is not enough reason to cut someone off without explanation. It's one of the most common complaints I see about our sub, and something that women tend to really struggle with when first integrating our advice. So let's review what a red flag really is.

A red flag is NOT just a flaw or something you don't like. It's not something like the guy doesn't make enough money, is short, isn't funny etc. It's also not an incompatibility, like you wanting kids one day and him not wanting kids (though that still might be cause to leave). A red flag is a signal. It says "Hey, this issue is most likely a warning that there is a much bigger, more dangerous underlying issue with this person. Get out before finding out what that is."

Never feel bad about leaving over a red flag, and never let anyone give you shit over it either. "You dumped him for watching porn?" No, I dumped him because his porn watching is a flag that he prioritizes his dick over women being abused and in fact gets off on it. "You dumped him over one harmless joke/neg?" No, I dumped him because negging is a flag that he preys on women's insecurities. "You blocked him just for adding a few inches to his height on his dating profile?" No, I blocked him because this is a flag that he has no issues with lying and putting on a false front about who he is. Who knows what else he will lie about...

Sometimes one seemingly harmless flag is a signal to a much scarier reality. What people don't get is that we are not just leaving over the flag itself, we are leaving because it is a warning sign of something much worse. Don't stick around to find out what that is and don't explain it to him thus giving him a chance to lie and defend himself. Block, delete, and move on.