Finally felt brave enough to share- My CAT 2024 journey.

GNEF, 21. This might resemble a RC passage so buckle up. In 2021 I graduated junior college with a 97% (Humanities), but mental health that was in minus figures. A very toxic relationship and daily fights with my father had me convinced that I was worth nothing, couldn’t do anything, my main priority at that point was getting out of my home, rather than create a career trajectory.

Going back I would have liked to study economics, but I found journalism interesting, and was accepted into a highly ranked program (NIRF top 5). The first two years of college I had an abusive boyfriend (the same person as high school). I managed to get him into the same university program as me by filling out his forms and writing his SoPs, as well as being the one to fulfill his boards requirements (we were a Covid batch). He repaid me by cheating on me with my best friend :)

I was 19 and thought okay, life can’t get any worse, this is rock bottom. There is nowhere to go but up. And I founded my own business- I started selling jewelry. Within the first year I had hit more than 1000 sales organically, with deliveries to 20 Indian states. I was thriving like I hadn’t in a long time, and I finally had a sense of purpose. I started playing sports again (I had once been a state champion in a martial art), devoting time to academic research, and all the while growing my online business. I felt transformed, and decided I would challenge myself- I was going to go to IIM A.

In the 8th grade, my dream was to go to Harvard. Then the financial realities as well as the lack of opportunity (coming from a small town) hit, and I thought okay, if not when I’m 18, I’m going to make it there one day. IIM A was just the first step- I’m a lifelong believer in the philosophy of continuous learning, and would like to pursue academia at some level even post-masters.

I graduated in the top 10% of my batch and started an internship in Bangalore while also attending CAT coaching. I woke up at 5am every day for 4 months, to make it to coaching by 6.30, and then office by 10, and be back by 6 so I could get in another 5 hours of studying. I did all of this with a foot that was still healing from a fracture, in a new city where my PG’s room was the size of a matchbox. Even when my quant scores were in negatives, I didn’t stop giving mocks or starting from scratch- I believed in myself, I would make it.

Cutting to the end stretch- I performed well at the internship and received a PPO that would have let me draw 80k per month as a BA graduate. But the job was demanding, not stimulating and not what I wanted to do long term. By then I had grown confident in my prep, touching 96-97ile in the AIMCATs. So i turned it down- and returned to my hometown.

The mock before D-Day- I scored 114 marks. VARC was my strongest section, and I had been AIMCAT AIR 2/3/4 multiple times. And guess what, it was VARC that was hardest this time. The unexpected trickiness of the section, coupled with the dabba PC I got at my centre constantly experiencing screen freezes, I began to spiral- and attempted far fewer question than I would have thought. The first 20 minutes of DILR- I have no memory of. I entered a semi-fuge state, where I read the passages but processed nothing, and the only thoughts in my brain were about how my months of preparation had gone to waste, about the job offer I had rejected. I semi-recovered in the second half, solving one set- but it would not be enough.

I came out with a 99.3 in VARC and 94 in QA- but a 66 in DILR. What stung the most was when I answered that same DILR section a month later with no practice in between- I scored a 95 percentile. I had been prepared for 99 that day, but my mind- it was my mind that killed me. I can’t help but feel like if I had kept it together, I would not be here right now, with one year of hope and dreams taken away from me.

That being said. I am fortunate enough to have a better family environment now, where no one beats me up for rejecting that job, and lets me live at home until I find work again. It’s been a bitter pill to swallow, dealing with job offers that pay half of what I was once offered- but that’s the price of gambling your bets, I suppose. But I force myself to see the silver lining- I’m just 21, with a 9/9/8 profile, and it could honestly be worse.

CAT 2025, I’ll see you there.