Things that would've happened if "Big Time Rush" had been PG-13.

1) Gustavo would've cussed in every third sentence. Every sentence when he was really steamed.

2) James would've had a lot of "sleepovers." A lot. Mama Knight would've eventually wised up to the double meaning.

3) The Jennifers also would've had a reputation for being, er, promiscuous. Katie would've referred to them as "the Whornifers" at least once. Additionally, they would've made good use of the word "skank."

4) Meanwhile, Logan would've gotten ribbed repeatedly for his chasteness.

5) The mystery of Mr. Knight would've been addressed. Maybe Kendall would have even run into him.

6) James and Carlos would've collected dirty magazines...and stuffed them under the sofa when Mama Knight walked in.

7) There would've been drinking going on. I expect there would've been some hangovers in "Big Time Party." And whenever Griffin overworked him, Gustavo would've definitely busted out the bottle (who knows how many hits were written in a drunken stupor).

8) Kendall and Lucy probably would've done more than just kiss in an elevator.

9) Speaking of Lucy, she would've done a fair amount of cussing. Her songs would've had explicit, Avril-Lavigne-type lyrics.

10) During their "off-again" phases, Logan and Camille would've been friends with benefits.

11) The conflict between James' parents would've been on full display. A sleazy womanizer leaving his socialite wife for someone fifteen years younger? Yeah. The arguments must have been nasty.

12) They would've shown Guitar Dude getting high (come on, do you really think he just played guitar?).

13) G-rated Jett Stetson was known for dating his co-stars. We all know what PG-13 Jett would've been known for.

14) 🎵 "Oh, you're such a sh*t, oh yeah, a giant sh*t, and you look like a sh*t and you smell like a sh*t..." 🎵