How am I supposed to heal from this

Going through the 2nd "breakup" in 6 months and it's such a mindfuck.

And it's not even "I don't like you enough" or "I'm not interested any more." This would be much easier. It's the circumstances, mental health, distance, timing etc.

"I hope we can be friends." when I clearly can't shake that little bit of hope off that somehow this is exactly what they need to deescalate the relationship and what they need to be able to interact with me without them pushing me away.

I still love them but I'm really cutting off contact for a while. I can't do this right now. My mental health is at an all time low and I need some time to get back on track. Some days are already a little better but tonight I dreamed of them. This is the shittiest I've ever felt and the worst thing is I can't even be angry with them.