Just need to vent. Weddings are inherently selfish and I'm offended that I've been invited to them.

I know that this is an extremely unpopular opinion but I just need to get this out. I also know I'd feel differently if they were my friends, but here we are.

Two of my boyfriend's friends are getting married this year. The first one is in June. I've already RSVP'd yes. That was before I looked at the cost and effort of the thing. We don't own a car, and renting a car even for a day is exhorbitantly expensive. The nearest hotel is a 17-minute drive away from the venue, so we have to drive or ask someone to come pick us up. Staying at the venue is too expensive. We just got a sort of agenda for the thing which includes a yoga class. I know it's optional, but I just can't express how off-putting I find that. I'll have to buy new shoes because I have nothing suitable. And then there's the obligatory cash gift.

I don't have a job right now (been unemployed for a few months and furiously searching), and my savings are dwindling as it is. I just find it kind of offensive to be invited to something when you have to front like $600 just to go. It's not a kind thing to do to people you supposedly care about.

To top it off, the guy my boyfriend is friends with really doesn't like me (my boyfriend knows this too so it's not just in my head). I decided last night that I can't go for all of these reasons. We have another invite coming soon for one that will be in November and I just already am dreading that too. Hopefully I'll have a job by then, but that one is a destination wedding and I can think of a million other ways I'd rather spend my money than being uncomfortable for 48 hours and watch two people I don't know get married.

I'm unfortunately at an age where people get married I guess. And it feels like the options are don't go and lose friends or pay a wedding fee and keep the friends. It just seems so unfair. I would never put any of my friends through this so I don't understand why it's socially acceptable to do this to people.

Would love to hear anyone's thoughts on this or any perspectives that can make attending weddings easier to manage.