How to stand up to oppressive mom

I (23F) have a few posts about my mom not allowing me to do certain things although im an adult. I am obese (300lb) and for 2025 i decided to set a goal to revive passions of mine I left behind once I started working full time at 19. Learning portuguese, playing piano and the big one is cycling. I have a goal to cycling around 24 miles on my 24th birthday.

I was just in my room watching cycling videos and she came and asked what i was doing. I said watching biking videos.

She then says, “thats stupid, you should be watching something about God that will edify your body!” Then walks away.

Um as ironic as that sounds… she does this with everything. I am very scattered brained about my goals but truly see myself accomplishing them. I enjoy fishing but everytime I bring up going she yells and tell me how dumb i am and how dangerous people are. I dream of visiting brazil and various countries and she says its dumb and i dont care anything about my safety or the state of the world.

I get very discouraged and unmotivated. It affects my work life as well as i don’t have confidence in what my hands can do. My self esteem sucks too.

Ive tried multiple times to express how i feel inside and it’s at a point it’s not even explicable. But an excruciating agony of feeling tied down by a sinking anchor. She just yells and fusses until i give up and cry myself to sleep.

i don’t mention how i take long drives alone to the city just to clear my mind because she would be livid.

People tell me to just say fuck her and do me but its hard for me to. Its not like im out here having casual sex and doing illicit substances

But how can i begin to start living my life? How i want to live it?